Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Discovery...
Discovery
Self-discovery is a wonderful thing. Looking deep within and making an honest assessment. We all have "things" to work on; however we must admit them... and work on them. Peace & happiness are priceless and worth the work to obtain and maintain.
The Universe is LOVE! We must love ourselves to truly desire and put the work into growth and change. Seeing ourselves honestly and loving ourselves enough to understanding that internal growth and change IS powerful.
The Universe is Infinite and what we do to one...we do to ourself and all... we do not operate in a vacuum... We are ONE.
Love is powerful; a key! We can find examples many places:
Song of Solomon 8:6-7 Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the LORD. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.
Ephesians 4:2-3 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Philippians 2:2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.
Our real personality is all light, all love, always shining--Upansishads
Even the sun and stars borrow light from the light of consciousness. The Self shining--Saint Teresa of Avila
Light, even though it passes through pollution, in not polluted--Saint Augustine
Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not--Emerson
Happiness comes from within, and rests most securely on simple goodness and clear conscience...to make another happy is to be happy oneself--William Ogdon
Apreciation is a wonderful thing, it make what is excellent in others belong to us as well--Voltaire
The life given by nature is short, but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal--Cicero
Discovery, personal growth and change are on-going and exciting! I Love because I AM Love! The Universe is calling, welcoming... embrace it as it embraces you!
Sunday, August 7, 2011
How Do You Define LOVE?
How do you define LOVE? You may ask twenty people and be given twenty different answers. Which is correct? Each is correct to the individual defining love.
Generally there is a common thread...sharing, giving and forgiving. Love is the one thing most people search their entire life to find. Sometime when found rather than cherishing it as a rare jewel people often treat love like a toy... to pick up, put down or ignore it will.
Domination & submission where does love fit in? Or does it? There again; this is very individual. Can a Dom/me love their sub? Can a sub love their Dom/me?
Is there such a thing as a PERFECT FIT? Perfect probably not; however fitting well together and complementing one another is more of a reality. No two people are exactly alike, nor Share the exact same experiences not even twins much less individuals who come together to form any type of bond.
Working to truly learn and care about someone or people is a full time job. It takes patience, understanding, honesty and dealing open and fair. NOT holding grudges or setting people up to fail.
How does one complement the other? By shareing, compromising and being honest. Is is possible that one can live in a dream world? Yes; however reality is always there. Living in the present, looking forward to as well as working toward the future and learning form the past are the building blocks of complementing the other.
How is it that one can idealize the past...which IS pass and not seem to grasp the reality of the present and the work it takes the build a future.
All relationships take work. Loving relationships take a great deal of work BDSM, Vanilla or otherwise. Sometimes you want to give up, sometimes you want to stay, sometimes you don't know what to do...
Is the LOVE enough, is the Domination enough is the submission enough are the scenes enough...is there commitment? If the answer is YES, then all of it together is MORE than enough.
How often can someone touch you mind, body, spirit and soul? How often can someone take you to the mountain top and allow you to sore with the Eagles? Intimacy is more than sex. Intimacy is learning what makes a person tick... What makes a Dom/me a Dom/me what makes a sub want to submit? A sub is not generally a mindless piece of clay any more than a Dom/me is infallible. Each have feelings and need validation. One must feel safe to let go and love. Loving unconditionally is required for all involved.
Words can hurt or soothe, actions can hurt or soothe, lack of action can hurt or soothe...
In any relationship each participant needs validation as to their value and meaning. No one generally feels comfortable without validation. No it is NOT insecurity usually, it is merely a confirmation that you are wanted, need and desired. Changing the script mid-way can cause even the most seasoned to question their purpose...their importance in their role.
How is it that something we search our lives to find can feel so good and hurt at the same time. No one has the answer to that question...one can try to come up with a hypothesis...but there is no true answer...the answers are as numerous as those one might ask.
How do YOU define love?
Generally there is a common thread...sharing, giving and forgiving. Love is the one thing most people search their entire life to find. Sometime when found rather than cherishing it as a rare jewel people often treat love like a toy... to pick up, put down or ignore it will.
Domination & submission where does love fit in? Or does it? There again; this is very individual. Can a Dom/me love their sub? Can a sub love their Dom/me?
Is there such a thing as a PERFECT FIT? Perfect probably not; however fitting well together and complementing one another is more of a reality. No two people are exactly alike, nor Share the exact same experiences not even twins much less individuals who come together to form any type of bond.
Working to truly learn and care about someone or people is a full time job. It takes patience, understanding, honesty and dealing open and fair. NOT holding grudges or setting people up to fail.
How does one complement the other? By shareing, compromising and being honest. Is is possible that one can live in a dream world? Yes; however reality is always there. Living in the present, looking forward to as well as working toward the future and learning form the past are the building blocks of complementing the other.
How is it that one can idealize the past...which IS pass and not seem to grasp the reality of the present and the work it takes the build a future.
All relationships take work. Loving relationships take a great deal of work BDSM, Vanilla or otherwise. Sometimes you want to give up, sometimes you want to stay, sometimes you don't know what to do...
Is the LOVE enough, is the Domination enough is the submission enough are the scenes enough...is there commitment? If the answer is YES, then all of it together is MORE than enough.
How often can someone touch you mind, body, spirit and soul? How often can someone take you to the mountain top and allow you to sore with the Eagles? Intimacy is more than sex. Intimacy is learning what makes a person tick... What makes a Dom/me a Dom/me what makes a sub want to submit? A sub is not generally a mindless piece of clay any more than a Dom/me is infallible. Each have feelings and need validation. One must feel safe to let go and love. Loving unconditionally is required for all involved.
Words can hurt or soothe, actions can hurt or soothe, lack of action can hurt or soothe...
In any relationship each participant needs validation as to their value and meaning. No one generally feels comfortable without validation. No it is NOT insecurity usually, it is merely a confirmation that you are wanted, need and desired. Changing the script mid-way can cause even the most seasoned to question their purpose...their importance in their role.
How is it that something we search our lives to find can feel so good and hurt at the same time. No one has the answer to that question...one can try to come up with a hypothesis...but there is no true answer...the answers are as numerous as those one might ask.
How do YOU define love?
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Anything Worth Having is Worth The Added Effort, Truely!
Anything worth having is worth the added effort. Completing school, obtaining a degree, certification, licence, etc all require hard work, patience,studing as well as the belief you deserve and can have what you are working to achieve. The same is true in relationships. BDSM relationships encounter the same challenges as Vanilla relationships. Communication and respect is the key. Yes, BDSM have respect in them just as Vanilla relationship; however the respect is deeper... What do I mean when I say deeper? Example Vanilla relationships engage on a more limited level. We are familiar with "I love you and will be with you always"... BDSM relationships have varing levels all very serious. Such as a relationship during a scene between a Top and a botton, Master and slave, Dom/Mme and sub and the list goes on. Or a contract relationship between a Master and slave with a date to begin and conclude service. Or the life partnership collaring and sometimes legal marriage. Each relationship has challenges...why? Because we are all imperfect people seeking to have our needss met through love. Yes love... A basic need for love is human. A Top, Daddy, Dom/Mme or other dominate person has needs to control, be respected, honored and valued for their role wheather in a scene or as a life partner. They give of themselves and care for those in-trusted to them. The Dominate ones are human, vulunable with feeling , flaws, fears, hopes and dreams just as the sub, slave, baby girl, boy etc. The subs have a role too, notmerely to serve, be punished, babied but to support their Dom/Mme in their journry. Subs have to be respectful, understanding, patient and caring. Subs do not only absorb and/or serve they have to be in tune with their needs as well as their Dom/Mme. It is true BDSM relationships may involve erotic mind blowing sex; however some BDSM relationships do not involve any sex only nuturing and providing a safe haven.The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and The New Bottoming Book by Janet W. Hardy; Dossie Easton each book discuss both sides of the same coin.Hard work does bring about rewards.
What do you do when there is an issue? Calmly disuss matter and admit your error if you are permitted to speak. Remain respectful and honestly review what went wrong, could something have been done differently. Dominates will admit errors when they are in tune with themselves and desire to maintain connection and deepen the bonds. Sometimes there is not any error only misunderstandings or misinterpetations. One must look at the intent... Was this or that meant to hurt or damage the relationship or break contract? More than likely the bonds can be maintained and strengthened.
What do you do when there is an issue? Calmly disuss matter and admit your error if you are permitted to speak. Remain respectful and honestly review what went wrong, could something have been done differently. Dominates will admit errors when they are in tune with themselves and desire to maintain connection and deepen the bonds. Sometimes there is not any error only misunderstandings or misinterpetations. One must look at the intent... Was this or that meant to hurt or damage the relationship or break contract? More than likely the bonds can be maintained and strengthened.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Erotica Weaving it into Your Daily Life
Have you ever wondered why you enjoy spanking, or being spanked, being restrained or restraining someone? Have you wondered why you are totally aroused by controlling or being controlled sexually? Do you wonder why you are turned on by different tactical stimulation, the use of paddles, floggers, nipple clips etc. Erotica... mmm when I think of erotica so many things run through my mind! Whips, chains, paddles, floggers, restraints, blindfolds oh my! Reading about and having erotica seamlessly blended into your life is possible and extremely rewarding.
You have to be honest and admit to yourself what you like sexually. The things you like may seem odd or taboo, at first... however if you do a bit of research you will find I am sure there are other people out there just...like...you. People who look 'normal' (whatever that may be...), go to school, church, vote have respectable jobs and careers. One does not have to be a "whore or a pimp"...that is a misconception. Are there those who are whores and pimps? Yes of course! Another spin on sexuality, that might be you too... but I am not talking about that end of the spectrum. I am talking about infusing your life with eroticism. The subtle additions to your life: reading, undergarments,articles of clothing, toys, role play...the list is endless and only limited by your boundaries.
Next this is the challenge does your lover/spouse have similar desires? Or are you single? Sharing this with the one you love is wonderful if it is mutual. This is not always the case... at times two people are together for long periods of times and never discuss sexual fantasies or desires. However when you feel safe and want complete communication open discussion is possible.
One can innocently discuss one's desires by mentioning I had a dream and... or I was daydreaming and... or I was thinking about... these can be icebreakers. You may find out your partner has fantasies of their own! Don't be judgmental listen with an open mind. This type of sharing can create bonds deeper than you could have imagined.
It is selflessly, beautiful and erotic to satisfy your lover/spouse deepest desire and have them satisfy your deepest desire. Sometimes these desires can be very similar or very different. In that case, what do you do? We will discuss that next time...
You have to be honest and admit to yourself what you like sexually. The things you like may seem odd or taboo, at first... however if you do a bit of research you will find I am sure there are other people out there just...like...you. People who look 'normal' (whatever that may be...), go to school, church, vote have respectable jobs and careers. One does not have to be a "whore or a pimp"...that is a misconception. Are there those who are whores and pimps? Yes of course! Another spin on sexuality, that might be you too... but I am not talking about that end of the spectrum. I am talking about infusing your life with eroticism. The subtle additions to your life: reading, undergarments,articles of clothing, toys, role play...the list is endless and only limited by your boundaries.
Next this is the challenge does your lover/spouse have similar desires? Or are you single? Sharing this with the one you love is wonderful if it is mutual. This is not always the case... at times two people are together for long periods of times and never discuss sexual fantasies or desires. However when you feel safe and want complete communication open discussion is possible.
One can innocently discuss one's desires by mentioning I had a dream and... or I was daydreaming and... or I was thinking about... these can be icebreakers. You may find out your partner has fantasies of their own! Don't be judgmental listen with an open mind. This type of sharing can create bonds deeper than you could have imagined.
It is selflessly, beautiful and erotic to satisfy your lover/spouse deepest desire and have them satisfy your deepest desire. Sometimes these desires can be very similar or very different. In that case, what do you do? We will discuss that next time...
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